Compassion

It was just over 3 years ago when I went, with a friend, over to the Poland / Ukraine border. It was about a month after the war had started between Russia and Ukraine. 

Like everyone else I'd watched the war unfold on the news, I couldn't believe what I was seeing. There were places to donate food, clothes etc around the UK. Money could be sent online to help. My friend suggested going to a small town in Poland that was 10 miles from the Ukraine border. In this town they had set up a volunteer centre in the local sports hall. Here the women and children from Ukraine would be processed, looked after and then sent on to a safe country.

It felt perfectly natural for me to agree to go. I wanted to help in some way and if I could get my feet on the ground over there and be of some help that would be great.

It's funny, I never once felt I was doing it for me or my ego.

The week before we flew out I was walking into town to meet my friend to go over the travel details. I bumped into Adam Hills, the comedian who hosts The Last Leg on tv. We got talking and he asked what I was up to. After I had told him I was going to volunteer at the Ukraine border later in the week, he said give me your phone number, I'll speak to the tv producers and maybe we can video call you live from the programme on Friday ?

Well, I suppose it would of been good but I didn't want it to be about me. He texted a few days later saying sorry, the producers had already planned out the show and couldn't fit me in, but  he wished me good luck for my trip. He seemed a decent guy.

On the first day in the small Polish  town I walked into the sports hall. It had been set up as a processing area for all the women and children who were being sent there from Ukraine.

It really hit home when I saw about 500 camp beds set up in the hall. There were people everywhere, sitting around, sleeping,  children playing.

We went to register as volunteers and were then sent to a big store room that was filled with donations, food, clothes, toiletries etc. I was stood with about 10 Polish people, one of the guys who was organising everything came over. It was funny because he shook everyone's hand and said Good Morning to them in Polish. When he got to me he said Hello in English. I must of stood out like a sore thumb.

He then asked " Why are you here?"

I replied, "Because I've come to help" 

He gave me a hug. It was the first of many times where I wanted to cry. But you can't, because as tough as you feel it is, it's absolutely nothing compared to what those poor Ukrainians were going through.

The day was spent putting bags of supplies together to be given to the families as they came in. I noticed that there were no men getting off the buses apart from a couple of elderly gentlemen. This was because all the men had to stay behind to fight in the war.

One girl about late 20's was stood in reception with her two small children. She looked utterly devastated. I made her a cup of tea. She was saying she didn't know which safe country she was going to be sent to and she wasn't sure if she'd ever see her husband again. What can you say to that ?

Think of these people the next time you're having a bad day, like when there's no wi-fi in the cafe you're in or your phone battery has gone flat and you can't get on stupid social media.

One of the days the Police took us to the Ukraine border and dropped us off there. Again, in an office, we were kitting up supplies into bags. Eventually a coach pulled up. The army went on first with dogs and checked for weapons and explosives, then the Police checked everyones documents. We could then go on and hand out the bags of clothes and food and water.

To walk onto the coach and see 50 scared people looking back at you was some experience. All you could do was smile, try to offer a friendly face and reassure them that they were now safe.

What I'm trying to say is, if you can help someone, in any small way, just do it. It's not about receiving thanks or anything like that. If it was the other way round you would appreciate someone trying to help you.

I wanted to put this down on here not as an ego boost for myself. I just spent 5 days helping out, in the whole scheme of things it was nothing. But maybe by handing somebody a cup of tea and a smile,  it might of made their day a little bit better.

I'm not saying that in your normal life you should go around and talk to everybody that you meet and make sure they are OK. 

What I am saying is treat people kindly and with respect. You just never know what is going on in their head or in their life. Sometimes people might be a bit off with you, no need to take offence. They could be under pressure with family life, work, illness or something else. It's not personal against you.

Compassion can come in many different ways. I struck up a conversation with a man in his 70's a few weeks ago. He then went on to tell me all about his poor wife who was dying of Cancer. I just let him talk and talk. It cost me nothing to listen and I think he was glad to let it all out.

I don't want to come across as Mother Theresa, because I'm not.  There are thousands of people out there who have dedicated their lives to help others. They deserve our full respect.

I just feel that we can all be nicer to each other, give up a minute of your time to help someone. They'll appreciate it and it'll make you feel good as well.